When your whole body is activated you get excited about life! You get inspired and motivated to participate in the world! Connect with what sets you most on fire, get suggestions on how to activate that, and receive tips on how to get your loved ones on board when they fall short of seeing what is important to you in this process.
MM549 – Get Your Blood Pumping
Hello, everybody, and welcome to this week’s episode of Motivate Me!
It’s Me! Time here on Motivate Me! and we are working on coming back from flat.
Before we start, let’s get into the right headspace. Let’s engage in the idea that this is time where YOU are the priority. Let’s take two slow, deep breaths to get us centered. Just follow me.
Today’s focus is: Get Your Blood Pumping
I have a disclaimer for today’s show: This episode is not a lecture on the benefits of exercise! And I have to tell you, of all the tips, tricks, and techniques I used to get my head and heart back in the game when I fell flat, this technique is one of my absolute favorites. And I think it’s one that most of us just don’t do enough.
I’ve come to understand that from a very early age, freedom has been a core value of mine. The day I got my driver’s license remains one of my most favorite days of all time. I was, literally, hooting and hollering for ten straight minutes at the top of my lungs on my first solo drive.
Another example of when I felt deliciously free was when I moved from New Jersey to California eight days after graduating high school. I only knew one person who lived there, and I knew before I went that two months after I got there, he’d have to go out to sea for six months. But, I wasn’t scared by this, I was excited by it!
Then there’s our podcast tour where we traveled the fifty states in ninety days interviewing people about passion. I’ll tell you something about that, I did feel fear before I headed out on that bad boy trip, lots of fear. But once I hit the open road, it was like my heart split open and I experienced actual bliss. I felt so alive. I felt so free!
Can you feel my blood pumping in these examples?
Now, here’s the thing, we can’t do one thing, no matter how big it is, and ride that out for the rest of our lives. If we don’t continuously nurture this side of ourselves, we will continuously lose ourselves, and we disengage from the world, our passions, and joy. In this way, it is like diet and exercise, this is another way we sometimes “let ourselves go.” We need to do things that excite us often, and when we’re off, we need to recalibrate.
So, let’s talk today about ways we can get our blood pumping again because this will increase your motivation, ignite your excitement about life, make you more creative, and improve your mood – and who doesn’t want all that!? And after I share my list of ideas with you, I will share a struggle I’ve been having within my marriage about exactly this.
OK… so if you want to feel great but you’re short on ideas on how to push yourself into that, here’s a list of SOME things to consider:
-get in the sun – for some vitamin D
-connect with nature – especially walking barefoot in the dirt
-take a risk – call that guy, invest in that stock, take that trip
-play like a kid – get on your bike (I’m in love with my electric bike), paint with your fingers, role play
-tire out your body – go for a hike, do yardwork, clean your basement
-meditate – you know I’m a fan! It can be exciting!
-watch a scary movie – not my favorite, but it will get your blood pumping
-listen to music – make different playlists: one for stretching, one for outdoors, one for cleaning, one for sexy time
-be curious – learn all the things! Why is NJ the only state where people can’t pump their own gas? How was the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup really invented? What’s Pink’s real name?
-visit new places – go on an adventure, explore, try new foods, take pictures
-plan a surprise – that always gets my heart pumping!
-make plans – to see friends, to see family, to relax, to have coffee, to go boating, to get excited for the future
-exercise – hit it hard or take it easy, but we can’t talk about getting our blood pumping without including the physical body
A favorite of mine is to do something that intimidates you. What intimidates you? Have you ever gone on a solo trip? Like, taken a flight, rented a car, explored a place you’ve never been all on your own? Even if you stay with friends or family, have you ever given yourself this kind of space? Space to think, space to make decisions that pertain to only you, like, where to eat or which route to take?
Recently, I spent a week back in New Jersey. I did just what I was saying above, I flew alone (without the dog or the husband), I rented a car, I drove all around New Jersey and Pennsylvania. I visited my dad’s grave alone. I ate and drank what I wanted, took the routes I wanted, listened to the music I wanted – and because I was alone, I could even wear headphones in the airport. Doing that is like giving life a soundtrack, it was amazing.
I love to travel with my husband, but I’ve been married since I was nineteen, so this was a new experience, and I wasn’t sure why, but I was having a lot of feels.
During flight delays and all the air time, I had a lot of time to analyze these feels. I was also able to speak to many female friends and family members in all stages of life and relationships about what I was feeling and get their perspectives.
Timing is everything, and this trip was right on time for me.
Let me share with you how my thought process evolved: I started thinking about if I was single. I asked myself: What are the first three things I would do if I suddenly found myself single? (If you would like to try this exercise, stop here and take a few minutes to really consider this. I suggest writing down your answers.)
If you decided to put us on pause to make your list, welcome back!
The first thing I would do if I suddenly found myself single is make less of a big deal about meals. I thought it was interesting that this came up for me, especially first. I’ve never really thought about this before, but the funny thing is, I’d probably save money and lose weight if I did this.
The second thing I would do is drive a convertible, instead of a minivan. I thought it was really wild that I had this idea, too! I have been considering the idea of having a convertible just because it’s so freeing, but in this scenario, I also saw something else. I, all of a sudden, felt like if I’m a single person I don’t have to worry about taking care of other people, I can focus on taking care of myself. I like to have a bigger car and bigger home so I can accommodate other people. I don’t know if this makes sense to anyone else. So I envisioned myself in a small, cool car and even pictured a small, cool living space.
The third thing I would do is allocate money to attend professional development workshops and some kind of retreats. I’ve always wanted to do this, but my husband isn’t into it because he already does this kind of thing at work. Well, I don’t get to and I think I’d enjoy it, so I want to do it.
So, these are my three big things. Nothing crazy. In doing this little exercise, I had a big realization, though: I was irritated. And I was irritated because I felt trapped.
My go-to was, of course, to blame my husband for my feelings, because this had to be his fault. His asking, “What are we doing for dinner” or saying, “I don’t want to get into another car payment” or me having to justify to him why a professional development opportunity is worthwhile.
I felt like a cat trying to get out of a bag. I felt trapped and suffocating… I just want to do what I want to do, stop controlling me, I can’t get excited about life if you are holding me down. These were my thoughts.
Is he, though?
I am well aware that no one can make us feel any kind of way. We make ourselves feel what we do. And I know this, so what’s really going on?
I looked at the three things I would do if I were single again, differently this time. And I realized that if I boil them down further, I think what I want is to simply worry less about others and do more for myself.
That this isn’t about anybody but me.
Now, I am sure you have come to the same conclusion I finally came to: Why do I have to be single to do this? I don’t! And I also don’t want to be single, I adore my husband – I just want to be free. We can be free and still be married and still be a mom and still have a career and still be all of these things together.
We just need to have the freedom to do things that get our blood pumping!
Unfortunately, this does not mean that we may not be met with resistance.
Sometimes it’s difficult to get what we need; family, responsibilities, and money come into play. Sometimes we know we need to do something for ourselves but somebody doesn’t see its importance, which makes us wonder if they see us and our happiness as important? And sometimes we feel resentful because we are made to justify what we want, like we need permission, like we’re begging for our own freedom.
All I can tell you is that each of our situations is different, but here are four tips that will assist you in getting a partner on board when you feel the urge to take part in an experience that they may not quite understand.
1. Know what you want and be able to clearly state it.
2. Know what you will be willing to compromise to get it.
3. Don’t assume you know what another person is thinking.
4. Don’t be afraid to have difficult conversations.
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I am going to leave you with some truth talk from me to you: It is vital that we activate our feel good hormones! Doing this inspires us to participate in the world around us, it inspires us to create, it inspires the kind of happiness that we project to others, and when we do these things, we feel valuable and important, we impact the world and live our purpose.
And here is a bonus, ladies and gentlemen: When you engage your whole body in an experience, you are focused on the present…it is in the present that we find true peace and happiness.
Remember, you Motivate Me!