We are in control of our mental and physical space, but so often we surrender these spaces to others. In this episode learn how to prepare mental and physical space where you can value time with self, establish freedom of thought, identify negative self-talk, and receive creative ideas.
If you are serious about wanting to get more out of your life, like, you know you are just FLAT, and you have made the DECISION to feel more, accomplish more, be more… then you’ve been paying attention to the steps I’ve been lying out here for you:
1. Making Yourself a Priority (take your time learning how to do this)
2. Taking on a 30-Day Challenge
3. Adding Daily Stretches
So what’s next? Next comes, Preparing Your Mental and Physical Space.
Here is what I mean when I say, “mental space”: Mental space is the space we hold in our mind for determining our perceptions of the world, for establishing our personal values and beliefs. It’s the precious key to our well-being, and it’s where our creativity stems.
Our mental space needs to be nurtured, and finding the time to do that is often low on the priority list. That’s why we call this time here together on Motivate Me!, “Me! Time.” And that is much of what you are doing when you spend time here with us: you are nurturing your mental space.
It’s important for us to see this time as valuable. Valuable enough for us to schedule this time. As in, put it on a calendar as we would anything else we find important, like taking a loved one to an appointment.
The first thing I had to do when digging deep to recover myself during quarantine was kick everyone else out of my mental space. Other people don’t belong here. In the third episode of this season I give you techniques on how to make yourself a priority. Our headspace is where that begins – it is where everything begins. Episode 534, Making Yourself a Priority, is an important episode, if you haven’t already listened.
This is why preparing your mental space is so important because we need to have this one most important thing: FREEDOM OF THOUGHT.
So many of us let others or the course of life just bump us along. We follow the leader of our tribe and do and believe the way others expect of us. Many of us don’t stop this flow to go against the current and form our own opinions. Many of us don’t realize we’re even doing that.
When I was 18-years-old, I moved from New Jersey to California to hold myself accountable for this. To figure out where I stood on politics, on sexuality, of race and gender, if I wanted to go to college or not. I need to figure out all the things. And I needed freedom from everyone who mattered to me to figure out what mattered to me. I needed this to establish myself and my person.
Taking a big leap like moving across the country is not necessary to accomplish this same goal. And being young isn’t either; we can do this at any age. Many people get into a place later in life where they decide they have a point of view they want to live.
We are always entitled to change our minds, our views, and our opinions. And our feelings and ideas matter. Our feelings and ideas make a difference in the world. The only thing we do need to abandon is the idea that anyone else has the power to control our thoughts and beliefs.
The best part about our mental is space is that it’s private. Not one single soul has access to our thoughts unless we give it to them. So play with this space. Try on all sorts of ideas. See which fit for you. Start slowly. Do this privately. But do this with the intention to create. To create what you ask? I don’t know and you may not know yet, either. However, if we give ourselves the freedom of thought to be anything and do anything, we will discover something we want to create.
Something that gets our head and heart back in the game of life.
So, scheduling time for ourselves can be difficult and establishing our own ideas and opinions can be intimidating, but nothing is harder than battling self-doubt. We can call this “self-doubt,” “limiting beliefs,” or “energy blocks.” We can call it whatever we want, but in the end, these are merely stories we make up in our head. Stories that are not true.
I am going to give you just a few examples of what I mean here, because this is a complex topic and our focus right now is to just draw your attention to the idea that you cannot allow yourself freedom of thought if you are concerned with the negative talk in your head.
Let’s say you get the idea to start a podcast. That’s EXCITING! Wow, you would really be putting yourself out there. How does the idea of this make you feel? The actual conception of the idea immediately lights you up! Because, you REALLY love, let’s say, being a birth doula, and you really want to share this with the world!! But uh oh, you snap that idea right back where it came from because the negative talk begins: I am not smart enough to figure out how to launch a podcast, there are people much more knowledgeable than me about being a birth doula, my voice is ugly, people won’t be interested in hearing about my life as a birth doula, people will laugh at me for wanting to do this, my friends and family will say this sounds like a stupid thing to do, I will look silly.
How many times have we thought we wanted to do something and a chain reaction of negative thoughts bombarded us?
Go ahead and acknowledge these negative ideas for a second, feel the weight of them, add some others that you know you have allowed to hold you back in the past. Maybe for you it is: I’m too old or young, I’m too fat or thin, I’m not attractive… I mean, these lists are always endless when our minds grasp at everything to keep us in our comfort zone!
I’m not asking you to let these doubts go, and that is simply because I’m not asking you to take action, yet. All I am asking you to do is acknowledge that they’re there, acknowledge that we all have them, and don’t let them prevent you from just dreaming and scheming. That’s all I am asking you to do: allow yourself to just consider the fun stuff without allowing the negativity to crowd it out.
Again, we do not need to share any of our thoughts with anyone right now if we choose not to, this is all just living inside us, but if we don’t give ourselves the mental space and freedom to be curious, to explore ideas that interest us, I fear we will never connect with ourselves in a way that brings true joy. We will continue to live the life others wish for us.
So, limiting beliefs are NOT allowed here in our mental space – we can do ANYTHING and think ANY WAY we want in our mental space.
The last thing I will say about mental space is that we need to prepare our mind to receive information. For now, all you need to do to do this is begin envisioning yourself BEING creative. SEE ideas flowing. KNOW that ideas will come. We will talk more about this later in the season. But, start here… simply envision this happening for you.
Now, what do I mean by “physical space”?
It’s just what is sounds like: a physical space that allows us room to think. A space where you feel physically comfortable. A place that is aesthetically pleasing to you. A space where you can sprawl out and experience unrestrained creativity.
You need to own this space. For me, it was the kitchen table to start. For you, it could be your car during lunch breaks! For someone else, maybe a sunroom or guestroom or their bedroom?
This space doesn’t have to be permanent, it just needs to be yours for your scheduled time.
What do you need to bring into this space that will get your juices flowing and help you discover your direction? That is specific to you. Something tells me that you know exactly what you need to bring into this space with you.
Listen, I am here to give you the steps I took to get passionate about life again, to reconnect with my purpose. I really wanted to feel excited again, to do something that felt important to me. I was driven to find this and it lead me back to you!
I want you to know that I continue to do all of the steps that I’m teaching you here, and that life has continued to unravel for me in a way I could never have fathomed. So, I hope you invest in yourself in this way to see what discoveries you can make.
I am going to leave you with some truth talk from me to you: You have all the answers. But if you are here with me now, you know something is missing and you know you need to simply uncover it. Take the deep dive into yourself. Don’t be lazy. You’re worth it and worthy, and you have barely scratched the surface of what this life has to offer you.
Remember, you Motivate Me!